- Thinking differently about a situation is more helpful than holding back emotions for long-term emotional well-being (Gross & John, 2003).
- Being present in the moment improves emotional control and gets brain areas going that are tied to self-control (Garland et al., 2015).
- Having people who care about you lessens stress and makes managing emotions better (Taylor, 2011).
- Holding back emotions can cause more stress and feeling emotionally tired over time.
- Being thankful, writing in a journal, and focusing on your breath can really make your mood and strength better.
Managing Emotions: What Ways Work Best?
Handling feelings well is really important for your head health, relationships, and how you act day to day. Emotion management is about being able to change what feelings you feel, when you feel them, and how you show them. Some ways are more helpful than others, and studies show that things like thinking differently about situations and being present are better than holding back emotions. This piece looks at various ways to manage emotions, how well they work, and how you can use them every day to feel better and be stronger inside.
Getting Emotion Management
Emotion management is how you handle your feelings to keep your mind steady and feel good. It uses both thinking and non-thinking ways that help people change how they react emotionally in different times. People handle their emotions by what they think, what they do, and how their bodies change.
Why It’s Important
Good emotion management is super important for
- Head health: Not being able to manage emotions well is connected to worry, feeling down, and not feeling stable inside.
- Making choices: When your emotions are balanced, you can think better and solve problems better.
- Being with people: Managing emotions makes less fights and better talking with others.
- Body health: Feeling bad emotionally for a long time can cause sicknesses from stress like high blood pressure and weak body protection.
By getting good at emotion management skills, people can make their whole life better.
Kinds of Emotion Management Ways
Emotion management ways usually are in two groups
Ways that Start Early (Before Feeling Emotional)
These ways stop bad feelings before they start by changing thoughts or changing what’s happening around you.
- Picking Situations: Choosing things to do and places that make you feel good and staying away from things that you know stress you out. Like going for a calm walk in nature instead of getting into a fight.
- Changing Situations: Making changes to things around you to feel less emotionally bad—like turning off news that’s negative or changing your work times to feel more balanced.
- Thinking Differently: Changing how you think about a stressful time to make it feel less bad. Like seeing helpful feedback as a chance to get better instead of thinking it’s mean to you.
- Moving Your Attention: Taking your mind off of things that bother you and thinking about nicer things, like doing a hobby when you’re stressed.
Ways that Start Later (After Feeling Emotional)
These ways happen after you already feel emotions and try to handle how strong they are or how you show them.
- Writing Feelings: Writing in a journal about feelings can help you understand them better and feel less bad by working through hard times in a good way.
- Holding Back Emotions: On purpose stopping yourself from showing emotions, like making yourself look calm when you’re mad. While this can be helpful sometimes when you’re with people, doing it too much can make you feel more stressed inside.
- Being Present and Calm Thinking: Being present in the moment lets people watch their emotions without judging them, stopping them from overreacting.
- Moving Your Body: Doing things like yoga, running, or dancing can be good ways to let out emotions.
“Feeling-Good” Emotion Management Ways
Some emotion management ways really help you deal with emotions in a good way, which makes you feel better and stronger emotionally. These ways are really good for your head health over time
Thinking Differently
One of the most helpful ways to manage emotions, thinking differently is about changing what something means to you. Instead of thinking about the bad parts, people learn to see things in a way that’s not bad or even good.
For example, instead of thinking, “I did bad on my talk; I’m awful at talking to groups,” thinking differently changes it to, “This was a way to learn, and now I know how to do better next time.”
A study in 2003 (Gross & John) found that people who think differently feel better in their minds and have less bad feelings than people who just hold back emotions.
Being Thankful Often
Doing things to be thankful, like writing in a thankfulness journal or thinking about good things, has been shown to make you feel better and less stressed. Regularly seeing things to be thankful for makes you look at life in a good way and makes bad feelings less strong.
Getting Help from Others
Talking to friends you trust, family, or groups that help can make you feel understood and less stressed. Studies show that people who have good friends and family do better at managing emotions and are stronger inside (Taylor, 2011).
Comparing Emotion Management Ways: What’s Most Helpful?
Not all emotion management ways work the same. Studies have often shown that some ways are more helpful than others
| Way | How Well It Works | How It Affects You Long-Term | What Studies Show |
|---|---|---|---|
| Thinking Differently | Very Well | Good for head health and being with people | Gross & John (2003) |
| Being Present & Accepting | Very Well | Makes you more emotionally controlled and stronger in your mind | Garland et al. (2015) |
| Help from Others | Very Well | Lessens stress and makes you feel better | Taylor (2011) |
| Holding Back Emotions | Not Well | Can make you feel more emotionally stressed and tired over time | Gross & John (2003) |
| Getting Distracted | Okay | Helps for a bit, but might not fix the real emotional problems | Mixed studies |
The Brain Science Behind Emotion Management
Emotion management is really tied to how your brain works and what chemicals are in it.
- The front part of your brain, which helps with thinking clearly and stopping yourself from doing things without thinking, really helps to stop emotional urges from the feeling part of your brain.
- The amygdala, which deals with fear and strong feelings, is controlled by thinking ways like thinking differently and being present.
- Chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin help with feeling stable, wanting to do things, and connecting with people—and doing things like calm thinking, moving your body, and being thankful makes them stronger.
- Brain pictures show that people who often do calm thinking have more activity in brain parts that are about knowing yourself and controlling emotions (Garland et al., 2015).
Easy Tips to Make Emotion Management Better Every Day
To make your emotion management skills better, try to use these things in your day
- Journaling: Write down your thoughts and feelings every day to see how you usually feel.
- Daily Thankfulness: Think about three things you’re thankful for, to make your mind more positive.
- Breathing & Calm Thinking: Deep breaths and being present in the moment calm your nerves.
- Thinking Differently: Really question bad thoughts and try to see other ways of thinking.
- Do Physical Stuff: Moving your body lets out good chemicals that naturally make you feel better and manage emotions.
Common Mistakes in Emotion Management
While many emotion management ways are good, some common mistakes can make them not work as well
- Using Holding Back Too Much: Always stopping yourself from feeling emotions can make you feel emotionally empty and more stressed.
- Avoiding Too Much: Not dealing with emotions can help for a short time but can make you feel worse emotionally over time.
- Thinking Distraction Is Management: Just doing things to distract yourself for a bit (like watching TV too much) might help for a little, but it doesn’t really fix the emotions underneath.
Main Points
- Emotion management is super important for feeling good mentally, less stress, and making better choices.
- Good ways to manage emotions are thinking differently, being present, thankfulness, and getting help from others.
- Brain studies show how dealing with emotions in a good way gets important brain areas going that help with emotional control.
- Holding back emotions usually doesn’t help and can make mental health problems worse over time.
- Using emotion management ways like journaling, being present, and breathing can really make your mood and emotional strength better.
Try using these ways in your day and see how they change how you feel. What emotion management ways have helped you most? Share your thoughts in the comments!
Sources
- Garland, E. L., Farb, N. A., Goldin, P. R., & Fredrickson, B. L. (2015). Being present makes you more aware and builds good meaning: How being present helps manage good feelings. Thinking About Psychology, 26(4), 293-314.
- Gross, J. J., & John, O. P. (2003). How people are different in two emotion management ways: What it means for feelings, relationships, and feeling good. Journal of Being Yourself and People Around You, 85(2), 348-362.
- Taylor, S. E. (2011). Help from people: A look back. In S. J. Lopez & C. R. Snyder (Eds.), The Big Book of Good Psychology (pp. 189-197). Oxford University Press.
